The Expat Files: Living in Latin America

-By popular demand…more tragic expat stories of utter failure. Some expats are sitting ducks! Get ready for some truly unbelievable stories of how expats can get taken advantage of big time. Yes, I get a steady trickle of sad stories like this one .. and 95% of them come from disgusted gringos who settled “on the gringo tourist trail” and got stiffed. I repeat- the overwhelming majority of hard luck tales come from North Americans "ON THE GRINGO TOURIST TRAIL". So it should surprise no one that so many get taken for a ride …

 

-A truly revolting human organ harvesting racket was very recently uncovered in Costa Rica. Worse yet, crooked surgeons were in cahoots with a Greek owner of a pizza parlor- a place where doners were recruited and paid 6 grand or so to give up a spare kidney. Now, if that doesn't make you want to pass on the pepperoni…  

 

-Just a few observations concerning the very wealthy gringo/expat set (there’s always a few very rich gringos scattered here and there). Inevitably, they and their families can’t help but hang out with or get personally involved with the wealthy Latin crowd...especially if the upscale gringos have school-aged kids . Here’s little snapshot of how that scenario can sometimes work out. 

 

-There are some very weird subtleties about the Spanish language that never seem to get taught in Spanish language courses. You really have to be in Latin America quite a while to pick up on the strangeness of it all. Though once certain contradictions have been pointed out everyone can have a good laugh… but don't think you'll always be laughing at the locals... sometimes you'll be laughing at yourself!       

 

-My January 2014 “Expat Wisdom” seminar is almost filled. To get one of the last 2 spots available, check out the agenda and the signup details by clicking on the Latin American Seminar link on the top of the www.ExpatWisdom.com mainpage.

 

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

-One effect Obamacare (the Un-Affordable Care Act) has on Expats permanently living abroad is that they won’t have to purchase the mandatory heath-care insurance. Expats are completely exempt and pay no fine like folks up in the states must do if they don’t purchase a plan. However, what about part time expats and expats who happen to travel back to the states for months or more at a time? Then it gets complicated…  

 

-Unfortunately, most of the ten million plus expats abroad end up filing taxes to support the Big Brother nanny state the no longer live in. So how do expats go about filing their taxes? Expats who live in tourist areas and transplanted gringoized societies like Costa Rica and in the hundreds of guarded retirement complexes in Mexico, etc., have no trouble finding qualified tax preparers when April 15th comes around (when IRS vampires need more blood). However, if you live "off the gringo trail" there can be so few gringos that  it can be quite difficult to find a qualified tax preparer. That makes for other great niche job opportunity for expat wanabees and gonnabees wondering how they might do business in Latin America. In fact, off the tourist trail, tax preparers are in such big demand that almost every expat I know asks for a recommendation. Off the tourist trail there are so few tax guys there’s almost NO competition.

 

-The continuing saga of Expat Eddie… this time he’s got a light new car to sell, cheap. No, nothing ratty about it. Not now. But you’ll never guess why he’s willing to let it go for a song. Like Eddie says, “It could only happen in Latin America!”              

 

-My January 2014 “Expat Wisdom” seminar is more than ¾ filled. To get one of the last 3 spots available, check out the agenda and the signup details by clicking on the Latin American Seminar link on the top of the www.ExpatWisdom.com mainpage.

 

“AN EXPAT’S GUIDE TO FIRST-WORLD  HEALTHCARE IN LATIN AMERICA”, That’s the name of my long awaited free report. It’s finally finished and will be available for a time at www.ExpatWisdom.com. Grab a copy and than compare how 21st century Latin American healthcare stacks up to your Heathcare in the states. Read it and weep! And remember the report is free(at least for now).

 

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

 

-One effect Obamacare (the Un-Affordable Care Act) has on Expats permanently living abroad is that they won’t have to purchase the mandatory heath-care insurance. Expats are completely exempt and pay no fine like folks up in the states must do if they don’t purchase a plan. However, what about part time expats and expats who happen to travel back to the states for months or more at a time? Then it gets complicated…  

 

-Unfortunately, most of the ten million plus expats abroad end up filing taxes to support the Big Brother nanny state the no longer live in. So how do expats go about filing their taxes? Expats who live in tourist areas and transplanted gringoized societies like Costa Rica and in the hundreds of guarded retirement complexes in Mexico, etc., have no trouble finding qualified tax preparers when April 15th comes around (when IRS vampires need more blood). However, if you live "off the gringo trail" there can be so few gringos that  it can be quite difficult to find a qualified tax preparer. That makes for other great niche job opportunity for expat wanabees and gonnabees wondering how they might do business in Latin America. In fact, off the tourist trail, tax preparers are in such big demand that almost every expat I know asks for a recommendation. Off the tourist trail there are so few tax guys there’s almost NO competition.

 

-The continuing saga of Expat Eddie… this time he’s got a light new car to sell, cheap. No, nothing ratty about it. Not now. But you’ll never guess why he’s willing to let it go for a song. Like Eddie says, “It could only happen in Latin America!”              

 

-My January 2014 “Expat Wisdom” seminar is more than ¾ filled. To get one of the last 3 spots available, check out the agenda and the signup details by clicking on the Latin American Seminar link on the top of the www.ExpatWisdom.com mainpage.

 

“AN EXPAT’S GUIDE TO FIRST-WORLD  HEALTHCARE IN LATIN AMERICA”, That’s the name of my long awaited free report. It’s finally finished and will be available for a time at www.ExpatWisdom.com. Grab a copy and than compare how 21st century Latin American healthcare stacks up to your Heathcare in the states. Read it and weep! And remember the report is free(at least for now).

 

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

 

-There are Latin cities and places “on the gringo tourist trail” and there are Latin tourist destinations that are mostly for Latin tourists... yet a small stream of first-world eco-tourists and adventurous types somehow discover them. Such adventurous gringos are more worldly than your average tourist and have a somewhat different set of wants and needs. These guys and gals have been to all the usual tourist hot spots and avoid the typical tourist traps and the gringoland scene. Since a certain percentage of these folks tricle off-the-trail to Latin tourist destinations, that means astute expats can do good business catering to these folks. By the way, the “gringo advantage” is also at its strongest in those low-key Latin tourist destinations.     

 

 -With all the talk about pollution and garbage problems in Nicaragua you might think I don’t recommend the place for expats. Well, you’d be wrong. Certain parts of Nicaragua do come highly recommended… but you’d better get in on the action before it gets saturated and expensive. There are thousands of disgruntled gringos who’ve been moving in and  believe or not, most of those migrating are coming from expensive, gringo- saturated, neighboring Costa Rica. Yes, people who’ve have had it with CR gringolandia are pulling up stakes and heading for Nicaragua….   

 

-Normally I don’t recommend the restaurant business for expats no matter what pipe dreams they may have of being the next “Top Chef”.  However, you will find that there can be extremely affordable turn-key restaurants for sale in most Latin towns.. these are businesses that for one reason or another have been neglected, yet are still chugging along, albeit in low gear. Many of these purchase opportunities are tailor made for expat success stories. That said, in this show we post an email from a part-time Texan gringo expat offering just such an opportunity (in a great Nicaraguan beach town too). A nice deal for any motivated expat with more vision than money.           

 

-My January 2014 “Expat Wisdom” seminar is more than ¾ filled. To get one of the last 3 spots available, check out the agenda and the signup details by clicking on the Latin American Seminar link on the top of the www.ExpatWisdom.com mainpage.

 

“AN EXPAT’S GUIDE TO FIRST-WORLD  HEALTHCARE IN LATIN AMERICA”, That’s the name of my long awaited free report. It’s finally finished and will be available for a time at www.ExpatWisdom.com. Grab a copy and than compare how 21st century Latin American healthcare stacks up to your Heathcare in the states. Read it and weep! And remember the report is free(at least for now).

 

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

 

-When moving to Latin America, you’ll occasionally have to put up with traffic freezing strikes and demonstrations (99% of them are very peaceful). Generally these strikes (called manifestaciones) are limited to blocking traffic in government districts since the guys going on strike always seem to be goldbricking, lazy-ass government employee unions or groups looking for a raise. By the way: the strikers almost never get what they demand and only succeed in messing up traffic for working people that have real, productive jobs. Sound familiar?    

 

 -The other day the touchy subject of forgotten land mines came up in casual conversation. A fresh, new, gringa expat mentioned she’d heard somewhere that  Latin America is still rife with forgotten (live) landmines dotting the countryside. Her point was that Latin America in the 70’s and 80’s was host to a dozen or so violent revolutions, coups and civil wars. So here’s the real scoop on what became of those leftover mines- mines by the way- our nice generous government handily furnished to US friendly Latin dictators back in the day…now its not mines, just money.   

 

-The good and the bad news about the recent spate of Latin American lake cleanup projects touted in the local Latin media outlets lately. Will these efforts work? Will they have some impact? I’d say using the phrase “naively optimistic” would be wildly optimistic to say the least… 

 

-A report on the glamorous subject of cisterns and septic tanks. Down in Latin America  sewage and raw garbage are treated differently than it is up in Cleveland. In the USA we prefer to bury it or vote it into office(that’s a joke… err, no it isn’t). But down in Latin America, who really cares about cisterns and septic systems? Pretty much no one… but you ad I definitely should!   

 

-If you’re a chicken and/or seafood eater, here are some tips on eating the best quality, natural, healthy, chicken and fish in Latin America

 

-My January 2014 “Expat Wisdom” seminar is almost filled. I've got just 3 or 4 places left. To get one of those last few spots, check out the agenda and the signup details by clicking on the Latin American Seminar link on the top of the www.ExpatWisdom.com mainpage.

- Part 3 of the transplanted first-world seminar and conference business in gullible Latin America: This time a real life very recent example of a well-advertised but bogus seminar that promises that attendees will learn the ins and outs of investing in Wall Street as well as teach them how to make a killing in currencies, commodities, options, bonds, etc…. just like the big first-world boys do it. And why is it obviously bogus? Because they promise you’ll learn all of this and more in just 4 hours… and get a nice fancy “Wall Street” diploma if you graduate (ha)to boot!

 

 - It can only happen in the third-world...some strange and curious aspects of internet service in Latin America that will certainly surprise you.

 

-Personal and business extortion is now the #2 crime in Mexico. Extortion used to be  the common crime in just the dangerous and poor neighborhoods but now the crooks are much bolder and have ratcheted the game up a few notches. Favorite targets now include gringos, expats and first-world holiday makers sitting in what they thought were nice, safe resorts and hotels. So if you’re the type to live, work or hang out in Mexico, you should be aware of the newest twists on the extortion racket. On second thought, if you’re in Mexico you already have a few friends with first-hand personal extortion stories. Most people pay up and don’t report it to the cops (who are usually in on it) so you’ll never know.   

 

-My January 2014 “Expat Wisdom” seminar is almost filled and set to go so. To get one of the last few spots, check out the agenda and the signup details by clicking on the Latin American Seminar link on the top of the www.ExpatWisdom.com mainpage.

 

“AN EXPAT’S GUIDE TO FIRST-WORLD  HEALTHCARE IN LATIN AMERICA”, That’s the name of my long awaited free report. It’s finally finished and will be available for a time at www.ExpatWisdom.com. Grab a copy and than compare how 21st century Latin American healthcare stacks up to your Heathcare in the states. Read it and weep! And remember the report is free(at least for now).

 

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

-Some very very bad news coming out of Venezuela concerning retailers and consumers. We’ve heard of strange presidential edicts before but this one takes the cake… and everyone suffers (except the crooked, inept politicians of course).

-The latest breaking news on Uruguay’s liberalized marijuana legislation and how it will affect the consuming public and those who want to it grow at home and as a business proposition.

-Part 2 regarding gringos and contracts in Latin America. Now and again we and our lawyers find ourselves signing contracts for certain standard amenities: like internet service, smartphone plans, alarm monitoring companies or cable TV installations, etc. But what happens if we sign a contract and don’t get what was promised? How easy is it to break a contract? What about buyer’s remorse? Are their some specified time frames to back out or cancel like certain consumer protection laws provide for contracts up in the states?

-A quick update on gringos transferring their old tired-out and saturated first-world seminar businesses down here to Latin America. Lots of dodgy stateside enterprises are finding out how easy it is… unfortunately most taking full advantage of the Latin gullibility factor and that legendary “gringo advantage” in order to make a killing on the locals. Surprisingly enough, even highly educated Latins fall for firsf-world seminar ploys. End even if it rehashed and useless tired-old stuff its all new to them and they walk out happy!

-My January 2014 “Expat Wisdom” seminar is 3/4 full now but I have a few spots left. To check out the agenda and the signup details just click on the Latin American Seminar link on the top of the  ExpatWisdom.com mainpage.

“AN EXPAT’S GUIDE TO FIRST-WORLD  HEALTHCARE IN LATIN AMERICA”, That’s the name of my long awaited free report. It’s finally finished and will be available for a time at www.ExpatWisdom.com. Grab a copy and than compare how 21st century Latin American healthcare stacks up to your Heathcare in the states. Read it and weep! And remember the report is free(at least for now).

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

-Some very sobering business news coming out of Argentina (again). The news this week is we’re seeing reports of big, well-known foreign companies closing up shop and leaving the country left and right. They just can’t deal with the restrictive business climate, the unions, the 25% plus inflation rate and the currency controls.     

  

-Some surprisingly innovative “world’s firsts” coming out of Latin America, something we would never expect.

 

-Expats with first world skills can land teaching jobs at Latin Universities that pay 50 to 100 bucks an hour! Sure it might only be part time work, but that means teaching but 5 hours a week means very big dough by Latin American standards ($1k to $2k a month part time).  But you do have to be an expert in some technical, artistic or business field to land a job at a university. By the way, you won’t need to know any Spanish either…  but…you just can’t blunder in thinking you’re gonna teach because you have a useless degree in communication, sociology, psychology, art history, drama or journalism (even an advanced useless degree). Latin folks with worthless degrees like that are a peso a dozen (like in the states). However if you have a track record back in the states, like an inflated wiki page or an unsuccessful book…one your mother bought the ten copies sold … well, the gringo advantage rides again!   

 

-Soon after landing, new expats will be confronted with various multiple page contracts (in Spanish). You simply can’t avoid them. You’ll get a contract when you rent, get internet cable, smartphone service, cable or TV satellite…. even when you sign up for Mailbox Etc. Here are a few tips on how to maneuver in that contract minefield….   

 

-The real scoop on cable and satellite TV in Latin America. How to get all of your favorite channels… in English   

 

-My January 2014 “Expat Wisdom” seminar is all set to go so... and 3/4 filled. To check out the agenda and the signup details just click on the Latin American Seminar link on the top of the ExpatWisdom.com mainpage.

 

“AN EXPAT’S GUIDE TO FIRST-WORLD  HEALTHCARE IN LATIN AMERICA”, That’s the name of my long awaited free report. It’s finally finished and will be available for a time at www.ExpatWisdom.com. Grab a copy and than compare how 21st century Latin American healthcare stacks up to your Heathcare in the states. Read it and weep! And remember the report is free(at least for now).

 

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

-Don’t expats miss big holiday get togethers with traditional turkey dinners American style with all the tinsel and trimmings? Well some years ago yes, but not anymore. These days there’s no lack of holiday parties or big traditional spreads put on by any number of bars, clubs and local pro-USA organizations. You'll find gringo holiday parties in nearly every city in Latin America . Not to mention big international hotels also offer their versions of extravagant holiday gringo buffets. But note: there are some club-sponsored holiday events I would never go to myself…

-A report on how Latin governments perpetuate corrupt road and infrastructure construction practices.Hear how they celebrate badly-done completed projects and how they put together new batches of badly-conceived projects they can milk (while partying at 4-star first-world hotels)

-Latin couples have about 101 different “terms of endearment” they use when referring lovingly to each other. The funny thing is, if we used some of these same terms (translated to English of course) on our significant others stateside we’d be in the dog house for sure…

-What about "Smart Meters" on the houses in Latin America? Just wait till you hear this take on them from a power company insider!

-My January 2014 “Expat Wisdom” seminar is 3/4 filled and all set to go. To check out the agenda and the signup details just click on the Latin American Seminar link on the top of the  ExpatWisdom.com mainpage.

“AN EXPAT’S GUIDE TO FIRST-WORLD  HEALTHCARE IN LATIN AMERICA”, That’s the name of my long awaited free report. It’s finally finished and will be available for a time at www.ExpatWisdom.com. Grab a copy and than compare how 21st century Latin American healthcare stacks up to your Heathcare in the states. Read it and weep! And remember the report is free(at least for now).

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

-Now some partial answers to questions I get asked repeatedly (especially from folks at my seminars). People always want to know about money transfers and how to do them in the most anonymous (and legal) way possible. Why? Because its nobody’s business where you send your money or assets or do business. And by the way: what’s considered illegal in one country is often legal in another… that’s why Bank havens have always been popular ..or were popular till the NSA started illegally collecting data on everyone and the abusive FATCA laws forced foreign banks to give up their US account holders.

 

-Illegal hardwood logging in Latin America: There’s a very very good chance the wood in your beloved bedroom or dining room set was obtained by hook and crook.     

  

-Its nearly always the same when us gringo expats get invited to upscale Latin parties. We soon find each other (since we all look alike) and end up congregating and sharing our weird Latin stories. Like our famous stateside Christmas/Thanksgiving parties- where ladies eventually congregate in the kitchen, and men end up glued to the sports channels in the den- we gringo expats congregate together at parties too. Why? because even if our Spanish is pretty good, soon enough we get bored with the superficial Latin blather. But wait!… Then there are the rare times you run into a so-called Latin “intellectual” socialist (a Public  university professor for example) who tries to hammer on any first world person he can find about the gringo imperialism bit (not that I’m denying it). With guys like that you can actually have a little fun…        

 

-My January 2014 “Expat Wisdom” seminar is all set to go so. To check out the agenda and the signup details just click on the Latin American Seminar link on the top of the ExpatWisdom.com mainpage.

 

“AN EXPAT’S GUIDE TO FIRST-WORLD  HEALTHCARE IN LATIN AMERICA”, That’s the name of my long awaited free report. It’s finally finished and will be available for a time at www.ExpatWisdom.com. Grab a copy and than compare how 21st century Latin American healthcare stacks up to your Heathcare in the states. Read it and weep! And remember the report is free(at least for now).

 

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

 

-We all know that in most of Latin America(especially in the dozen or so countries off the gringo tourist trail) the personal, business and corporate taxes are extremely low compared with first-world rates. But knowing that there are corrupt, megalomaniac politicians in power, what can we expect from them in the future? Might the tax situation worsen and become a bad copy of the truly hideous first-world tax structure? After all, Latins do love everything first world…

 

-Where do Latin country debt levels stand right now and how do they compare to first-world debt? Are Latin debts serviceable and sustainable or are they (like the USA, Ireland, Greece and Japan) in dangerously uncharted waters?    

 

-Some expats say that Chile has two big things going for it;

 

 #1- some say Chile is the cleanest and least polluted Latin American country. I fact, even the poor uneducated lower classes seem to have the good manners to pick dispose of their garbage properly as well as beautify their yards and streets as best they can.    

 

#2 – some say Chile is considered to be the least corrupt country in Latin America. Meaning most cops and politicians won’t take bribes (note I said most). However, many long term expats believe cops taking bribes is actually a backhanded advantage- being that it’s a huge time saver. The fact is, when expats first arrive they’re appalled at being hit up for such bribes… while others come to appreciate how a little "mordida" slices through the calcified bureaucracy. You’ll just have to come down and make up your own mind.

 

-And now, a telling email from a love-lorn nerdish gringo who has reasons for wanting to come down to Latin America that are not quite usual and customary…  

   

-My January 2014 “Expat Wisdom” seminar is all set to go so. To check out the agenda and the signup details just click on the Latin American Seminar link on the top of the  ExpatWisdom.com mainpage.

 

“AN EXPAT’S GUIDE TO FIRST-WORLD  HEALTHCARE IN LATIN AMERICA”, That’s the name of my long awaited free report. It’s finally finished and will be available for a time at www.ExpatWisdom.com. Grab a copy and than compare how 21st century Latin American healthcare stacks up to your Heathcare in the states. Read it and weep! And remember the report is free(at least for now).

 

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.