The Expat Files: Living in Latin America

The Expat Files

Dishonest Road Contractors, The Cost of Living, Farming, Fertilizer and More: - Market madness, the art of buying fresh food and produce. - Why shifting to granulated nitrogen fertilizer (petroleum based) is having a lasting negative effects on farming and the farmers themselves. - How the ruling party buys elections with your 1st world donations. - Why LA governments love 1st World infrastructure donations, but hate the specialists sometimes sent to oversee the projects. - Why new LA roads go so bad so fast and why everyone in the know clams up when you talk about it.

The Expat Files

Think that 1st World Republicrats are Corrupt? You Ain’t Seen Nothing Yet: - Why in lovely Costa Rica, the “Switzerland of Latin America”, are three of the last five Presidents in jail or fugitives in exile? - Why is it so common that deposed, indicted and disgraced Latin presidents live the life of Donald Trump (but with normal hair) while exiled in some neighboring Banana Republic? - The reasons that cowardly and corrupt Latin judges just roll over like pet Chihuahuas whenever politicians face charges in their courts. - Legal tricks lawyers use and how they strive to make trials drag on forever (or at least until the next election cycle). - Why white collar crime pays (and why in fact crime just pays in general). - More tips on guarding and waterproofing your valuables at the beach. - Yet another annoying car theft scam that you just won’t believe.

The Expat Files

Some 3rd World Survival Tips, The Cost of Living, Emails and more: - More cost-of-living examples that will surely make you want to move here. - Expat cinema, video store and DVD experiences (both legit and pirate). - Slick tricks to try when there’s no water in the restroom (no, and I don’t suggest using your shirttail, yuk!). - An Expat Traveler’s arsenal- some cheap, common things you should always carry or have on hand, (no, I’m not talking firearms here) that make life a lot easier down here. - The present state of recycling garbage in LA, (ha! ha!). - A tiny secret weapon for survival, that you hope you never have to use.

The Expat Files

General Safety Tips; - What’s wrong with my theme song, ‘Down Mexico Way? Well, for one thing, I don’t. recommend living, working, playing, and/or retiring in Mexico! But I guess I just like the song. - In S. America, they have refrigerator/freezers that run on a propane gas flames and use no electricity whatsoever (Hey, are you pulling my leg?), and they’re great. - What's the most dangerous place in Latin America? Would you believe the kitchen? - Buying and using household appliances down here. - The four kinds of vehicles on the road that you never, ever, want to drive behind, and why.

The Expat Files

Road Hazards, Car Problems and 3rd World Driving Survival tips: - Pickups, 4x4’s, and other macho vehicles we recommend that you drive. - Why lightly used luxury sports cars are so very cheap down here (and why only entitled kids of rich idiots drive them). - Tumolos (i.e., speed bumps on steroids), and other car pulverizing Latin road hazards, and how to deal with them. - Driving Latin style; where tailgating is a way of life, and rear-end collisions trump all other smashups. - Two different ways to get a Latin driver’s license; the cheap, normal way (by way of a driving test), and the slightly more expensive grey market away(by way of cash money).

The Expat Files

FOOD PRICES, the COST OF LIVING, and more on BANKS; - Kicking your addiction to 1st World specialty items and why buying locally produced stuff is both smart, and cheap. - Cooking with gas, electricity, or wood. Yes, half the people down here still use wood! (and you’re wondering where the rainforest went?). - High fructose corn syrup, and why it hasn’t caught on down here (thank Buddha). - The many ways a simple 2x4 framing stud down here beats its 1st World equivalent hands down. - When crime pays; Bank robberies in Latin America, and why just YOU might get robbed right outside of your bank.

The Expat Files

The Right Car To Drive, Car Theft, and How To Deal With Traffic Cops - Part 2: - When thieves steal your car and negotiate over the phone. - Why there are so many hit and run accidents (er,… I mean the other guy actually running away on foot!). - How and why a collision can be 100% your fault, and NOT your fault at all! - Expats, breathalyzers, drinking and driving and the state of the DUI laws. - Expats, radar, and speed traps. - Why 1st World safety violations don’t mean a thing down here. - Why the Macho society kicks into high gear when women Expats face the cops, and/or the legal system. - Why Expats bearing small gifts make for big favors when dealing with cops.

The Expat Files

The Right Car To Drive, Car Theft, and How To Deal With Traffic Cops - Part 1: - Why it’s smart for Expats to “temporarily” go native (when it comes to cars). - Why Police roadblocks are everywhere, and they love stopping Expats. - What to do when you get pulled over and they search your vehicle (illegally). - The fine art of bribing the police, and why you won’t have to ask (they will). - When cops bond with Expats, just play along (and try not to laugh). - A simple $5 way for Expats to totally foil a car thief.

The Expat Files

Electric Utilities, Power Outages, Part 2, - Your undecipherable utility bills part 2… just like in the 1st World, only worse (since they’re in Spanish). - How Expats handle power outages. - Where and why power outages do and don’t occur… And it’s not just a roll of the dice. - The truth about portable generators, and what you’ll really need in a pinch down here. - Total 3rd World energy self sufficiency? Can Expats really get off the grid and stick it to the oil companies (well, almost, but not yet).

The Expat Files

Understanding Electric Utilities, Part 1: - 3rd World utility bills,… And you thought nothing was more confusing than your 1st World utility bill! - The secret cult of Kilowatt hours explained (almost) in 30 seconds… Hey! Watt the hecks’s a watt anyway? - How big power subsidies for the poor distort an already terrifically screwed up energy market… And why energy’s practically the only thing that ain’t cheap down here. - Why its no use fighting it out with a 3rd World utility company. If you think your bill’s wrong, its best to take a few deep breaths and just pay it(and then have a couple of margaritas). - You know those little yellow “Energy Consumption” appliance stickers? They have them down here all right, but they’re all in English (duh!). - The age old Latin custom of tapping into a power pole and stealing juice.. not recommended (but done all the time). - Clandestine cable TV hookups, and other lessons learned while living in the land of the pirates.