The Expat Files: Living in Latin America

Expat Files - Hair Bandits - 08/18/13

- They say poverty breeds crime, but it also breeds a certain creativity.
I bet you haven’t heard of the latest, greatest creative low-end crime to hit Venezuela. Try “hair bandits”. Yes ladies, if you’re in a big city like Caracas and you have a nice thick head of hair… be on the lookout for guys bearing shears because you just might lose your locks. These days, a nice head full of hair is going for about $450 to $500 (I mean the hair without the head) and there’s a thriving market. So that bulge you see in that weaselly guy’s pants- might just be a scissors…just thought I’d give you a head’s up!

-And now for a few casual expat observations regarding Latin ladies and Latina fashion trends. Latinas have their own kind of style, and make their own kinds of personal fashion statements. As far as what they consider the pinnacle of personal beauty, they have very strong likes that might differ a bit from what you and I might imagine. 

-Now for Part #1 of another absolutely true Expat Eddie story…
You’ll never guess what happened on my recent trip with Eddie (and his runway model girlfriend). We went for a shopping trip to the massive San Salvador central market and as usual it was a real adventure. Just remember, what happens to us could happen to you too…

-For all of you curious about how our last Expat Wisdom seminar in June went down… two of our attendees, Deane and Heather, put together a great 10 min slideshow/audio clip with some very cool visuals. Now you can see what it was like (and what you missed) as we all trucked around with our “boots on the ground”
Just go to ExpatWisdom.com and click on the “slideshow” link. 

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one. 

-And while you’re at www.ExpatWisdom.com don’t forget to pick up your free reports! 

The Expat Files - 08/16/13

The Expat Files - 08/09/13

-For all of you curious about how our last Expat Wisdom seminar in June went down…  two of our attendees, Deane and Heather, put together a great 10 min slideshow/audio clip with some very cool visuals. Now you can see what it was like (and what you missed) as we all trucked around with our “boots on the ground”

Just go to ExpatWisdom.com and click on the “slideshow” link.   

 

-If you do a search on the net or read any of the hundreds of mags, rags, articles and blogs on the subject, it would seem that those Latin American “Pensionado” programs are all the rage… or are they? As it turns out, the actual number of 1st world foreigners who apply and sign on for such programs (basically aimed at retirees with 1st world pensions like SS) is pathetically small compared to all the articles and hype about it. And here’s the latest poop on the subject…  

 

-Speaking of those pensionado programs, many pensionados in Latin countries will agree that the so-called perks and discounts one is supposed to get with such a retirement-residency card are not what they’re cracked up to be, and here’s why…   

 

-You may have heard that Nicaragua is the latest greatest, cheapo, retirement darling in Latin America.. or so say the mags and rags like International Living and most other retirement letters too. Well, the place is heating up all right. But clueless investors and developers are coming out of the woodwork- yet another sign a real estate bubble is definitely taking shape there too.. 

 

Still more news on the Latin real estate bubble…. little by little, desperate sellers are starting to appear. You can spot their little ads occasionally in the big city Latin newspapers which is another sure sign the market is beginning to crack around the edges

 

-Here's the skinny on monthly maintenance charges for apartments, condos and townhouses in Latin America

 

   -Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

 

-And while you’re at www.ExpatWisdom.com don’t forget to pick up your free reports! 

 

Expat Files - For Sale - 08/11/13

Expat Files - Hit and Run - 08/04/13

-It happened again, my car (almost) new car was hit in a parking lot… another hit and run... and no little note of apology on the windshield either (yeah right!) Now, I didn’t notice the damage till I came back from my errand, and when I asked the guard and the people hanging around the lot, no one saw at thing… naturally. But since this is Latin America, the story doesn’t end there… it never does.

-Keep in mind that any verbal agreements or handshake deals you make with Latins are flexible and nonenforceable and can even get out of hand. Yet, first worlder’s like us are used to doing a certain amount of casual business that way. So when you make a friendly deal, do go ahead and close it with firm handshake but always get the terms in writing too!

-I’ve had my light new car (a compact 2012 model) in the body shop four times already in just one year! So the question remains; how much parking lot “scratch and dent” stuff can, or should, we gringos take before we just throw in the towel and let our vehicles devolve into typical Latin American beaters? Well, here’s my rule of thumb on that…

-Normally when you have prepaid cellphone and you purchase additional minutes everything goes smoothly and without a problem. However there are some penny ante but annoying scams that you should be wise to. Note if you’re not paying attention when buying extra phone minutes, you could get ripped off and not even know you’ve been had-  not for a while anyway (and sometimes you’ll never find out!)

-Be sure to follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

-And while you’re at www.ExpatWisdom.com don’t forget to pick up your free reports!

The Expat Files - 08/02/13

Expat Files - These Days - 07/28/13

-These days, in most of the 20 Latin America countries, regular gasoline is now around $5 a gallon. However there are a small handful of oil producing Latin countries whose governments (not just Venezuela) heavily subsidize gasoline at the pump. And though it sounds like a dream come true for the locals its created some dark, unintended consequences…

-And now a true incident  I witnessed as so-called government VIPs (truly ass-wipes) embarrassed and demeaned a young worker at a local Latin gas station. Things like this give real working folks plenty more reason to despise politicians and government jerks of all stripes…. from any country.

-Gringos often wonder why Latins don’t seem to be bothered by unsightly garbage and ubiquitous litter dumping. For the average guy, tossing trash in bins or cleaning up the yard or the neighborhood does not seem to be on the radar until its so bad someone complains. And while Latins don’t notice or care about the mess they create, gringos and foreigners seem too embarrassed to call them on it. Meanwhile, its the efforts of gringos and foreigners that keep up the pressure to act ;like adults.

-Driving a car in the rainy season can be a harrowing experience. That's when might come across a temporary lake (that used to be a road a day earlier), and yet there may be no alternative but to trudge forward into the unknown. But my advice is to wait for some brave soul or two to slogging through ahead of you first. Let him be your “canary in the coal mine”...the scout that finds the hidden underwater potholes along the way, not you!

-There are some very insulting Spanish slang words that you should NEVER use yourself;  forbidden slang when speaking to a Latin person of any social class. And even if you hear Latins using them now and then (and they will) you should still keep them out of your vocabulary.

-What about the catch-all word “gringo”? Is it a compliment, an insult, or just plain neutral? Well, its mostly a compliment, but it can be all three of the above... depending on how its being phrased…….

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

-And while you’re at www.ExpatWisdom.com don’t forget to pick up your free reports!

The Expat Files - 07/26/13

-If you like Animals…

In Latin America, outside of the big cities especially, expect to encounter perhaps ten times as many animals as you would in your day to day life in Cleveland.... animals of all kinds. But its not a bad thing, just part of the experience. You’ll get used to it quickly if you remember the various creatures are just going about their business as you are. Just be aware when driving (especially at night) that animals of all kinds might cross the road…. or even slip into your house.

-Out in the boonies many poor farmers with small plots of land still have horses instead of cars simply because horses are cheap, reproduce, and are very low maintenance (since owners just let them out to in the morning to graze). However, most are scrawny, sad looking, overworked and underfed. Then there's the case of those special show horses that good excellent and eat well but suffer just as much but in different ways...

-Most Latin American small farmers live on the edge of insolvency and don’t have a bit of discretionary income to call a veterinarian when animals get sick or injured. Instead they keep their animals healthy and fit by simply consulting the guy behind the counter at the local “Agropecuaria” feed store. They take his sage treatment advice as gospel. And what does that have to do with expats?  If you have animals or pets, you can visit the ever-knowlegable “agropecuaria” guy too. Expat Eddie vouches for that 100% and here’s why…..

-One of the things that first world people find hard to believe is how scheduled and prescription drugs are available at Latin pharmacies without a doctor’s prescription. Because of that fact a lot of young partying US tourists (mostly spring-breakers) come down on vacation and try to score Xanax, Tylenol #3, Zoloft, Viagra or whatever. Well here’s the scoop on that…

-Recreational drugs in Latin America…

What with marijuana so cheap its practically free, and cocaine dirt cheap too, isn’t it funny that in 20 plus years down here the only gringos I have met who really abuse the stuff seem to be those spring-breakers again and college kids on vacation looking for that never-ending party. Long term expats (off the tourist trail) are not so inclined to get wasted that way (booze is their drug of choice). And as for the Latins, the only ones I know that really abuse the stuff are the upper class (2%) gringo wanabees, the Latin yuppies (and their spoiled children) along with certain privileged kids in private high schools and colleges. And since they are gringo wannabees too, their drug of choice is not pot, but cocaine and the designer drugs, like exstacy.

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

-And while you’re at www.ExpatWisdom.com don’t forget to pick up your free reports!

The Expat Files - Pets in Latin America - 07/21/13

-Should you, or shouldn’t you, bring your pets down to Latin America? Well, along with the hassle and stress of getting them on an airplane, through customs and immigration, many animal-loving wanabees wonder if Spot, Rover or Obama can really settle in comfortably and get the kind of 1st world treatment they were getting back in Cleveland. …

-Now for the real story on pet food products in Latin America. And yes, nearly all of the first world brands are available, but choosing the one Rover liked to munch on in Cleveland is not as simple as you think, even though its in the stores, and here’s why….

-Dog, dogs everywhere. Yes, Latins do love their dogs… and the poorest of the families always seem to have more Rovers (and kids) than they can possibly handle. And yes, those critters do spend the day roving the neighborhood since their owners don’t have food to spare and rarely have extra dough to buy real dog food. That means you’ll see a lot of sad looking skinny dogs giving you the hungry eyes, So if you’re invited for dinner, its ok to stealthily drop a few morsels under the table

-Today we discuss a few more sure-fire business ideas for expats, this time dealing with pets and animals. The “gringo advantage” rides again in that department too!

-Like Richard Martin says on PRN’s “Wake Up Call” show, I too am very much convinced that enlightened first-world people must get out of Dodge before Big Brother closes the window completely. Many smart people in the know think that door will shut tight in the next year or so at most. So, If you don’t make your plans very soon you’d better buckle up and get ready for the worst ride of your life. The American dream has moved to Latin America. There will not be better days up north and It will only get worse.

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

-And while you’re at www.ExpatWisdom.com don’t forget to pick up your free reports!

The Expat Files - 07/19/13

-When you’re off the tourist trail and not living in a transplanted gringo neighborhood, your Latin neighbors will surely be kind, friendly and gracious…unless you’re an unsociable jerk. You’ll probably the only gringo in the subdivision and as usual you will get the visiting dignitary treatment. And sure you’ll always have that oddball neighbor with a barking dog or have to deal with a problematic neighbor kid, but that’s life. Recently Expat Eddie had such an incident to deal with, and he did so in his own peculiar way…

-And now a valuable housing tip that I wish someone would have mentioned to me when I first arrived in Latin America….NEVER rent, buy or build within six blocks of an Evangelical church. That is, unless you don’t mind your Saturday and Sunday nights tinged with erratic high volume wailing and guttural noise pollution (which begs the question; is Jesus deaf?)

-If you live in an upscale first-world style subdivision, it’s a fact of life that you might be sharing the neighborhood with a few thieving politicians and the occasional upscale narco (they can be decent family men too). Both types can afford to live anywhere they want. But unlike the Hollywood stereotype, upscale narco guys will strive for a nice life but keep a low profile. So here are a few tips on how to handle the situation if you or your kids get invited to a “cince anos” party at Tony Soprano’s house…

-Find out why Expat Eddie insists that  “IMPATIENCE is a virtue” (when in Latin America of course). Hear his reasons why its a big part of the “gringo advantage”

-Wanabees always ask about low budget business ideas that a new expat can instantly jump on. Well, like I always say, “boots on the ground” is the best way to find out. And sometimes one only needs a week or so to see a great little opportunity or niche market. Now for example, the last seminar group that came down in June just boiled over with business ideas after just a few days here. But what about expats with very low or almost no capital? Well here we give an example of an ultra-low budget, unglamorous but novel, business idea (one of dozens tossed around at the June event) that one of our seminar gang came up with just by spotting an obvious (or not so obvious) need...

-Follow the link on the main page at www.ExpatWisdom.com to schedule a private consultation with me. If you want to discuss the details of living, working, playing, doing business and/or retiring in Latin America, now you and I can talk about your situation one on one.

-And while you’re at www.ExpatWisdom.com don’t forget to pick up your free reports!